Thursday, January 12, 2023

The Life and Times of a Dead Man - Episode 14 - The pornographic slime

Gattlebee tells the companions that what he needs is in the freezer. Zita inquires about what Gattlebee needs, but he assures her that she doesn’t need to know. She tries again, and he says it’s all that is left of his marriage. 

He unlocks the doors and ushers the companions inside. They enter what used to be a tasting room. As they watch, two things drop from the ceiling behind the bar. The constructs start chanting, “Good day. Welcome to the Yeast of Day brewery. I hope you are enjoying your tour.” 


The two clockwork tavern keepers come around from behind the bar. One of the clockworks grabs Sabrina, and the other attacks Dol. Audrey Rose throws a bomb at one construct while Sabrina slips the bond. The constructs attack Sabrina and Dol again, who both fall unconscious. Zita tumbles behind the enemy and stabs them. Audrey Rose throws bottled lightning at one of them. It fizzles and then closes in on Gattlebee. 


Hendra flanks the other construct with Zita, who daggers it. Hendra stabs it too. Gattlebee takes a five-foot step away from his construct and throws bottled lightning at it. Audrey Rose throws bottled lightning as well. The construct attempts to hit her but misses. The other construct hits Hendra but does not grapple her. 


Zita stabs the construct on a vital junction. It collapses. Audrey Rose destroys the last construct with bottled lightning. 


Sabrina argues with Gattlebee about the circumstances. Neither is happy with the other. 


We enter the brewery proper. There are large-size brewing tanks throughout the room. Gattlebee heads to the back, where the cold room is located. As they cross the open floor, Zita and Hendra notice that the dust on the floor has recently been disturbed. Sabrina hears metallic thumping coming from somewhere in the room. 


Gattlebee opens the door. This room is freezing cold. There are crates and barrels everywhere. Gattlebee reaches up on top of a high shelf and pulls down a silver ring; he pockets it. “That’s everything. We can go now.” The group turns to go. 


As they head towards the exit, two creatures appear. One appears like a diabolical cactus, and the other looks like a wyvern. The cactus person, Dewey Daystar, tells the companions, “Hold it right there. Reach for the sky. I know you got the alchemist, Gattlebee. He has committed crimes against nature. … None of you are going to leave this building.”


Dol attempts to daze Dewey Daystar. It doesn’t work. Tweetie bear attacks the drake, but it avoids him. Dewey gestures, and his green skin turns brown. The drake starts a dodge parry dance with Tweetie bear; neither can hit the other. Sabrina uses hypnotic stare on the creature. It retaliates with an attack of opportunity against Sabrina. 


Hendra runs forward and shoots the creature. Zita dashes toward the drake. Dol was moving toward the catwalk when a pornographic slime suddenly emerged. She runs away. Tweetie Bear enlarges and continues its dance with the forest drake. Hendra is unable to charge. Meanwhile, Zita closes in and stabs the drake. Audrey Rose throws a bomb at it. 


The pornographic slime pursues Dol, who continues to outrun it. (Jim yells, “It’s coming after you.”) Tweetie Bear wrestles the drake to the ground and breaks its neck.  


Daystar yells, “You’ll all pay for that.” He gestures, and hail starts falling on the group. Zita falls unconscious, and Sabrina dies. 


Audrey Rose throws a bomb at Dewey Daystar, but it doesn’t appear to do much damage. Suddenly, he turns into a bear. 


The pornographic slime closes on Audrey Rose, but her shield protects her. On the other side of the room, Dol pours a potion down Zita’s throat. The bear claws at Hendra and grapples her. 


Audrey Rose throws an acid bomb at the bear. The ooze wraps itself around the bear’s head and suffocates it to death. A little cactus form of Dewey Daystar is found within the ooze. 


Dol searches for Gattlebee so that they can get the hell out. Zita drags Sabrina’s corpse toward the exit. They hightail it out. Audrey Rose checks on Sabrina, but she is truly dead. Dol finds Gattlebee and directs him to leave. Bosley helps Zita carry the body. The party makes it safely out of the Yeast Brewery. 


Gattlebee disguises himself as Sabrina. They stuff her body in the bag of holding.


Sabrina is in a long winding line of people. Standing before her is a grey elf. She seems confused and asks, “Where are we?” Sabrina hears music. Two skeletal women in colorful flowery dresses approach her. Sabrina asks the elf about the two skeletal women, but the elf is no longer paying her any attention. One of the skeleton women is playing an instrument. She asks Sabrina, “Why are you so worried about money?” She hands Sabrina two silver pieces. Sabrina is wearing a tunic and has nowhere to put her money. Sabrina claims to have lost her two silver pieces and asks for two more. The lady hands Sabrina two silver pieces. Sabrina still has only two. She throws a silver piece into the woman’s guitar case, a pitch-black void. “I’m not sure you are worth it,” says a falcon-headed figure behind her. He’s got weapons struck throughout his body. “You’re really desperate to get out of here, aren’t you?” he asks. Sabrina asks, “What do I have to pay?” He grabs Sabrina by the head. “Oh, I see what you can do.” He hands her a collection of shiny cooper cubes and instructs her to swallow them. She swallows them. 


Zita and Bosley are trying to stuff Sabrina into a bag when she awakens. Everyone is shocked to see her alive. They make the twenty-minute trip to the Broken Barrel. Phoebe is behind the bar. Audrey Rose tells Phoebe that they were ambushed by alchemical goblins. She’s surprised to hear about them because Ambrose wouldn’t usually hire them out. She’s less surprised by Daybreaker and his drake. She recognizes the goblin gang as the Chemical Kids. Phoebe needs to look into what’s happened. She gives the companions each 250 gold. 


We need an in with one of the religions to get a cure light wounds wand; otherwise, they must go to a House Jurisco hospital. They can also go through the Pathway society. 


The companions wind their way home, resting and preparing for their future adventures.


They get 1100 XP.



No comments: