Thursday, May 24, 2007

Nothing Doing

So I sit down to run this morning

We will be updating the Live servers to version 14.20070508.2T on the morning of Thursday, May 24th starting at 2 AM Pacific (4 AM Central / 5 AM Eastern). Estimated downtime is 2 hours.

No CoH today for me. So instead, we bring you an old episode of "THE RACHAEL STORM SHOW!"

*Pan into a Television Studio. Rachael Storm comes out waving to applause *

Hiya everyone! In the tradition of Dear Abby, Anne Landers, and The Robot vs. The Aztec Mummy, I've decided to help make the world a better place by sharing my knowledge and wisdom. Plus, I decided that if BC in GTR gets an "Ask BC" forum all to herself, I should at least get a lousy thread!

So, got a question? Need some advice?

Ask away!

Our question today is from Alisson
How do I get Alisson to 51, even though she's always in debt?

This was something that occurred to me when I was promoted to Security Level 50, thereby becoming Hero of the City! It seemed that no matter how much I tried I just couldn't get recognized for my efforts.

So, I decided to spend sometime meditating on the subject, hoping to obtain the inner wisdom necessary to accomplish this task. Below are some excerpts from my journal detailing my journey.
Day 1

Drank 3 Killer Shrews.

The Satellite of Love telling how to mix a Killer Shrew
  • Chocolate Ice Cream
  • Cap'n Crunch with crunch berries
  • Peanut M&M's
  • Mrs. Butterworth's
  • Circus Peanuts
  • Mr. Pibb
  • Marshmallow Peeps. Lots of marshmallow peeps
  • Sweet Tarts
  • Vanilla Frosting
  • Good-N-Plenty
Pour it into giant plastic tulip glass and garnish with a wind-up shrew

and watched David Lynch Film Festival
  • Eraserhead
  • Blue Velvet
  • Wild at Heart
Day 3
Finally stopped screeming. Still no answer to THE question. Must take more drastic measures.

  • Consume 4 pounds of Ginseng
  • 3 pots of coffee
  • in addition to items on day 1
Day 5
Is it warm in here? Ned to find answer to queshuns.
  • Take a bath in ice water
  • eat a whole box of cough drops
  • in addition to times on day 3 and day 1
Day 6
Walls won't stop talking to meh. Still no solushun to porblems repssented
  • do all that stuff again, but this time attach battery cables to ears
This has goitta work

Day 9
Plolice brung meh home. The were very nise. But I stil don have teh anser to teh kweschun. M
4, OK 6 stuff...(battery cables fun) so u do that and then take aspirin.

Day 12
meep meep meep

Paragon Psychiatric Ward Records
Patient: Rachael Storm
Status: Getting Better
Description: Patient was found running through Siren's Call naked and screaming "Ur t3h n00b. I kil U! Im t3h ub3r." Was finally brought down by a team of Longbow. I'm confident that she will make a full recovery.

Well Alisson, I hope that you can learn from my experiences.

Now...where are those battery cables?

Rachael Storm

Got a question? Post it here!

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